Surgery Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the “anterior cervical minidiskectomy with fusion and plating C5-C6.” Though I try to keep the images of my neck being cut open and bones reamed out with power tools out of my head, I’m ready for this. Since last Friday I’ve had to wear a soft collar whenever in transit (car, plane) to keep from further injury because even a small accident could lead to permanent nerve damage. Though the pain is what brought me to the doctor, I’m even more ready to get rid of the constant worry.

Picked up some shirts that button down the front, since my wardrobe consists almost entirely of turtlenecks, pullover sweaters, long-sleeved t-shirts, and fleece. It might be a few days before I’ll be able to pull clothes over my head.

Later it’s to the grocery store for soft food. The esophagus has to be moved out of the way. I try not to think of that too much, either.

Tomorrow morning to the hospital at 10:30 to prepare for surgery at 12:30. If everything goes well I’ll be out by 7pm.

It’s hard to think about all of this. At the same time, though, I’m ready to let it go and let things happen as they will. There isn’t really a choice involved in having this done — though there are surgical risks, there are even greater risks in not taking care of it. As I sit here right now I have a low-grade headache and a dull pressure pain at the base of my neck. Though the pain itself isn’t debilitating, it’s become a constant presence, a reminder of imminent danger.